Silence filled the railcar station as they sat on the seats, both of them looking down. The sound of the train hitting bumps on the tracks was the only thing keeping the area from being a hollow, noiseless space. Siren looked pale, almost like his life force had been sucked and drained away, empty, basking in what's left of the falling sunlight. Ana, however, looked to be brighter despite the sorrowful look in her eyes, guilt still fueling her drive. She leaned on the edge of the seat, her head resting on the edge of the seat. Despite being told it was okay, she felt herself losing it, breaking down to the very core. If she lost it once, who's to say she wouldn't lose it again? This time, what if things went too far and-
"Ana." Siren muttered, his eyes still looking down as his tired eyes blinked slowly. Ana quickly leaned up, her gaze looking forward, as she couldn't bring herself to look at him.
"Y-Yeah, Siren?"
" How do you feel?"
"I feel. . . Whole, like a plant that was just watered on its last day of living, being replenished on the brink of death. . ." She muttered, her tone guilty, yet warm. Siren leaned back against the seat, sighing heavily as he glanced at her, making her almost flinch under his empty gaze.
"Then why do you feel bad? I told you to have your fill, yet you seem upset. I'm guessing I didn't do a good job, huh?" He muttered, disappointingly, glancing away for a split second.
"N-No! You were amazing. . . It's just. . . I didn't want the experience to be so.... forceful. I practically took advantage of you, and yet you choose to act like it's nothing!" Ana's tone rose, filled with self-spite. Siren glanced back at her, their eyes meeting for the first time in hours. The sun's light quickly vanished as they entered a tunnel, a yellow light appearing past them now and then as it covered them in darkness.
"What happened isn't some disgusting moment; it was a part of who you are, and I can't pretend that part of you doesn't exist. I've spent my entire life looking after you, being by your side even when you didn't even have a home to go to. I would lend you my old treehouse, bring you food and water, books, covers, clothing, and you think that this would bother me? Ana, as much as you may hate it, you're an ice elf. It's in your DNA to want that. Sure, it may have been an uncomfortable first time for me, but it was to help you out, and that's what matters." He said so effortlessly, almost like water running down a calm stream.
Ana gripped the bag in her hand tightly, her heart pumping as she sighed heavily, the train leaving the empty tunnel as the sun had set, the full moon's light glowing bright as the two stared at each other, the somber release of guilt slowly leaving Ana's body as her head leaned against Siren's shoulder.
"Thank you for doing that for me. I'll try to keep more pills on me to prevent it from happening again." She said, taking a deep breath as the train came to a stop. The two stood up, walking out of the now-empty train as the duo made their way to the dark streets.
"I guess I'll see you at prom?" She asked, looking at him with a large smile. Siren nodded as he began to walk in the opposite direction.
"I'll be there!" He said nonchalantly, his steps easy yet tired.
"Ana. . . Make sure to start taking care of yourself more often, it'd make you happier in the long run," he muttered softly, his voice grazing the wind. With those few words, he was long gone in the distance, his steps quiet yet filled with irritation, as he swayed with each shift in his legs.
Ana let out a loud sigh as she slowly began walking down the cold, cracking street. As she traveled down the dark sidewalk, her thoughts began to creep up behind her, tingling her spine. A part of her darkened at the thought of her succumbing to her deepest sins. No matter how hard she tried to fight it off, it always won. Even when allowed to indulge her instincts, it still feels like a crime. Day by day, she has to live up to the standards of what her genes dictate, manipulate her very genetics to live up to standards that won't judge her.
A tear shed down Ana's cheek as a soft breath escaped her lips; The only thing she could see herself as was a plant that had reached its peak, slowly reaching its final month, before slowly falling to time itself. The starry sky gleamed above her head as she looked up, watching as a lone star beamed brighter than the rest. With a bit of hesitation, she stuck her hand out, covering as she squeezed it into a fist. Even when she's an adult, she is still out of reach, yet to reach what she truly wants. The tapping of footsteps caught her sensitive ears as she turned her head, an uneasy feeling as each step was followed by an intense pressure, fueled by the sense of anguish and grit.
Her silver eyes glowed as a tall man appeared before her, his face symmetrical yet holding that old look, almost like he was in his forties, his thick beard connected to his side burns as his hair, his silver eyes were almost hollow, as if life had carved into his very spirit. He wore a fancy suit, his tuxedo black with silver lines around the collar, his shirt white. There was a small copper chain attached to his pocket, a small clock dangling at his side. Their eyes met, a small pause between the two as the old man stopped in his tracks.
"Pardon, but why do you hold such disdain in your eyes? It's very concerning for a mistress such as yourself," he asked, his voice deep yet mature. Ana's eyes looked at him in confusion, his face familiar, yet not a single memory was there involving him.
"I'm sorry, what?"
"When you looked at me a moment ago, you held a level of shame within your pupils. So I asked you if you were mentally stable." He claimed, his eyes wandering at the stars.
"No-no, I'm okay, sorry, but who are you? It's kind of strange to start a conversation like that." Ana asked, as she brushed her hair to the side, trying to seem more mature than she is.
"Ah, that detail wouldn't matter all to much, you'd be bound to forget way too quickly." He claimed"
"And what makes you think I'd forget?"
"I say that because I am a man of many things: leadership, dreams, hope, the very land we stand upon. Now, I am a man without a face, without reason, nor purpose. I simply don't exist, but that is okay in the end. Allow me to ask you a question. Even when your very life guides you towards a path you dislike, do you believe you can stray from that path, follow something more fruitful for yourself?" He asked, as he grabbed his clock, checking the time. Hearing such a question stumped Ana. Having a stranger walk up in the middle of the night, having a conversation without anyone around, was already alarming, yet a part of her could not care about herself at the moment to not indulge the stranger.
"No, I don't think so. If you're born into a lifestyle, no matter how things end up, you can't abandon that way of thinking just because. It's there forever, no matter how much you wish to change it." She muttered angrily, clearly reflecting on herself in her nihilistic words. The old man snickered as his eyes widened slightly.
"Then, I'll ask another question. Do you want to change?"
"I.. Would give anything to change."
"Then, young lady, take my watch. From this point on, you're a new person with new goals and a new mentality. Whenever you feel worried you're sinking into your old ways, look at my watch and remember your newfound dedication," he declared, ripping off his pocketwatch and tossing it at Ana as she glanced at the watch, its rose-like design on the back and a ragged texture along the outline. Before she even realized it, the man was walking past her, a hat now appearing on his head.
"W-wait! At least say your name at least!" She pleaded, the man turning his head to face her as his smirk was now a smile.
"Abe, young miss! The name is Abe! Have fun with your new life, and thanks for the encouragement!" He happily declared, his tone joyful yet chipper for his age However, he came to a sudden stop, his head turning as he glanced at her sterningly. A cold smirk appeared on his face as he muttered a few more words. "By the way. . . Beware the Shade in blue. Let it consume you, and you'll never see anything but black." His words were sharp as he slowly turned his head back in front of him, as he walked into the distance. A warm, fuzzy feeling heated her chest as she let out a soft sigh, squeezing the clock as she closed her eyes.
" A new me… The Shade in blue. . ." she muttered to herself. Abe had a point, sure, she could keep acting like her Ice elf side is a burden, but it's still a part of who she is, and it doesn't have to define her. Sure, her urges would still be still be a problem, but she shouldn't have to be shamed of what her body naturally needs, and neglecting it shouldn't be an option; it isn't good for her body or her mental health. And what was that speal about a Shade? She wasn't sure if that even was a word.
Today would mark the day that she would rekindle that dying flower, that even if it doesn't have an initial purpose, it can still find one in the future, by making a new type of plant or bringing a lively atmosphere into the scenery.
Not all plants need to wither to reach a destination; they can still flourish even in despair. She would bloom in times of madness