"Oh for sure." Naruto said as he tried to push himself up onto his elbows, "And I'll repay you by not telling Gamabunta that you blew up his stockpiles of sake when you were practicing Katon: Gamayu Endan (Fire Release: Toad Oil Flame Bullet)."
"Asshole." Gamakichi complained, "I told you that in confidentiality."
Naruto let out a weak laugh, "You told me that in a bald-faced alcoholic haze. Gamatatsu may be dumb but at least he holds his liquor better than you."
"Whatever." Gamakichi dismissed, "Summon me to hang out later, or to meet that silver-haired girl you live with that has the nice ta-tas again. You were right, they are great." Naruto opened his mouth to curse Gamakichi out and ask how the hell he knew he said that when the toad grinned at him, "I'm not the only one that says confidential stuff when I'm smashed Mr. Gropey no Hentai. Catch you around Naruto-nii." He then dispelled in a puff of white smoke to return to his mountain.
Naruto sighed and rolled over onto his back, looking straight up at the stars, "Come out Sai. I need you to drag me back to the apartment anyway… I'm wiped out."
Sai appeared from the tree line inside of the gates of the Forest of Death with a plain look on his face, "You have groped Hamako-san?"
Naruto glared at him, "She's always coming in my bed to sleep with me and I tense up at night, fratricide of a grabby nature is par the course if she keeps doing it." "Whatever you say Naruto-senpai." Sai said, getting a growl from Naruto, "Danzo-sama has sent me to inform you that he's already given you everything he could conjure on the Akatsuki."
Naruto narrowed his eyes, "Everything he could or everything he would? Don't give me that crap Sai-kouhai, I know Danzo-jiji knows more than he's giving me."
Sai blinked emotionlessly, "He has handed over everything to you that corresponds to your current situation. Nothing else he has on Akatsuki is relevant to your plight. I made sure to push your suspicion to the contrary on him to get him to say as much."
"That's bullshit…" Naruto said as he looked back up at the night sky, "Fine… He's given me more than the official records have forked over at least, that's for damn sure. You know Hamako has been asking when she would see you again, I think seeing one of her first friends would make her happy." Sai walked over to the downed Naruto, "I don't have friends Naruto-senpai, you know this. You know how we are supposed to be."
Naruto sighed, "Yeah I tried telling her that but she didn't listen. She thinks she's friends with you, and from the way we both met her I can see why she would, even if you don't think so yourself. Just drop in and say hello if nothing else one of these days, it would make her smile."
Sai put one of his creepy fake smiles on, "You can make yourself smile without emotional provocation senpai. She can smile without my presence."
Naruto let off a sweatdrop, "I mean a legitimate smile, you know, because she's happy to see you." Naruto sighed when Sai gave him a blank look, "Nevermind… I forgot who I was talking to. Damn it you're going to get the concept of happiness and all of the other emotions even if I have to beat it into you at some point." Sai kicked a prone Naruto eliciting a grunt from him, "It doesn't look like you can beat anything into anyone at this point in time senpai. Would you like me to inform a medic-nin of your condition?"
Naruto paled, "No just drag me home. Tsunade-baachan said that she would kick my ass if she found out I was overtraining in the Forest of Death again." A smile then came to his face, "Hey this would kill two birds with one stone. You can get me to the apartment and see Hamako-chan at the same time. Chop-chop kouhai, get me out of here."
Sai would have rolled his eyes if he had the emotional inclination to do so, "As you wish Naruto-senpai…"
XxX
Instead of dropping Naruto off like a normal human being would, i.e. getting the key from him, opening the door, setting him on the couch, you know, things that a friend would do, Sai dropped Naruto in a heap at the front door of the apartment and knocked on the door before disappearing in an ink shunshin. Naruto groaned from his spot on the ground, "Sai-kouhai you asshole…" Naruto mumbled.
After a moment a pair of familiar amber eyes opened the door, looking around curiously before seeing Naruto on the ground, "Naruto-sama? What are you doing on the ground?" Hamako asked with a slight tilt to her head.
Naruto looked up at his assistant with a dry look on his face, "Didn't you know? One of my favorite things to do is get chakra exhaustion and lay down on concrete floors directly outside of my apartment door."
Hamako puffed her cheeks out indignantly, "Well if that is the attitude you're going to have about it then I guess you can spend the rest of the night outside." Ignoring the indignant face Naruto had put on at that point, she shut the door. "What? This is my house. How in the blue hell are you going to lock me out?" Naruto got over his shock after a second and inched his way closer to the door with his chin before slamming his head into it, forgetting completely about the security measures on it that rejected his 'forceful' endeavor and sent him flying into the back railing, sounding a massive clang out as he smacked the metal with his body, "Ugh… Like that obviously, because it may be my house but they aren't my seals. Hamako-chan let me in!"
Her muffled voice sounded out from inside, "If I let you in Naruto-sama you wouldn't learn anything. I'll get you in the morning."
Naruto blinked in confusion for a moment before yelling, "What the hell am I supposed to be learning?"
"What the hell was that?" The door next to Naruto's apartment opened to reveal the confused red-haired neighbor of his that finally looked upon his form, upside down, heaped against the railing, eyebrow twitching. An amused grin crossed her face as she sauntered over to him casually and kneeled down to him, "Having some trouble Uzumaki?"
Naruto let a mildly amused smirk adorn his features, "I've graduated to you using my surname have I Tayuya-chan? I'm so happy." His smirk turned to a frown, "I pissed off Hamako-chan and I do not have the energy to open my door due to me blowing all of my chakra heedlessly. Open it for me would you?"
Tayuya raised an eyebrow, "Hell no. I've tried opening your door before; the first time it shocked me, the second time I lost consciousness and woke up in the Forest of Death, and this time after seeing what happened to you I'm not touching that door."
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