I woke up under the dining table.Not because I meant to sleep there, but because it was the only place not soaked in blood or occupied by corpses or treacherous nobles.Valmor was asleep beside me, his head resting on a silver platter.
"How many people died last night?" I muttered.
Valmor opened one eye. "I stopped counting when the little prince threw a bomb off the balcony."
Ah, yes. The royal coup.That little thing they said would be over quickly.Spoiler: it wasn't.
I crept out, my original intention being to find water and bread untainted by the remnants of human ambition.
But before I could escape the palace, someone grabbed my arm.
"There she is! The maid from the east wing! She's still alive!"
Me: "Sorry, I'm—uh—I'm just a background casualty."
Too late.
I was dragged into the basement, which had now been repurposed into… an emergency strategy room.It used to be a wine cellar and a place for disciplinary punishment. Now it was a makeshift command center filled with a mix of nobles, servants, doormen, and one man who insisted he was a "former spiritual advisor to the Queen, certified by the mountain academy."
They sat in a circle, draped in whatever robes they could find, faces full of trauma and paranoia.
The leader, an old woman wearing a fake diamond necklace and an expression that screamed I know who poisoned the soup yesterday, said,"We are the Last Light. We will endure. And you…"Pointing at me."…we need you."
I raised my hand. "Question: why?"
A bald man next to me whispered,"Because everyone who knew the location of the underground map storage is dead. And they say you always look 'suspiciously clean'… classic sign of someone who knows the water routes."
A revolting line of logic. But disturbingly sound in this world.
So now here I am, just an ordinary woman who only wanted a bath and some sweet tea, sitting in a basement with revolution survivors, discussing survival tactics, surrounded by emergency rations that… look suspicious.
Valmor growled quietly (yes, he can)."I smell malevolence coming from that canned sardine."
I slowly slid the can toward the bald man.
The old woman began to speak:"We'll wait three days. If no help comes from the outside, we'll sneak out and spread the truth."
I interrupted, "Or… we could just go out now and pretend we have amnesia. I'm really good at that."
Everyone stared at me. Some confused. Some shaken. One looked like they'd just had a spiritual awakening.
The old woman came closer, stared into my eyes."You… are clever."
"No. I'm just lazy."
Silence.
Eventually, they agreed to stay hidden until the third night.Unfortunately, I was assigned the first watch.With Valmor.By the narrow staircase.With no bread.
I stared at the damp ceiling, then at Valmor.
"You know, horse… my life used to be boring. But I miss boring. Boring was peaceful. Boring was beautiful."
Valmor licked the wall.
"How does it taste?"
Valmor: "Despair and minerals."
"You're lucky we're stuck in here today—if we were outside, I'd have turned you into horse fried rice by now."