Aureum tried to follow the friendly advice.
She did not go into his tent when he was absent, tearing it apart for anything incriminating. She didn't lurk around him, waiting for a slip-up. But she couldn't resist having one eye on him. Or waiting for a chance.
It began fine.
Everyone had dinner. It was the time after that, when people were full and tired but not quite willing to go to their tents and sleep. A perfect time for idle conversation, finally allowed by fine weather.
With so many days of being rained on and cooped up, the sinking sun made the conversation high-spirited.
Aureum didn't know if Lacuna and Sitis were trying to keep their relationship secret, but Lacuna's cozy conversation with Sitis would have clued Aureum in, even if she hadn't seen them kiss.
She shook her head.
At least they seem happy.
It wasn't like the couple had to announce anything.
Intentional or not, it gave Aureum the perfect opportunity to linger awkwardly around Mendax. Talking was another matter.
I just have to open my mouth.
She took a deep breath.
And not tread on the lying snake in the wrong way.
She sighed. The consequences for saying the wrong thing went from benign to terrifying. She rubbed her neck.
"You don't look happy for them," Mendax said.
It's not like Aureum's awkwardness went unnoticed. But being unable to look at Mendax directly meant she had absently eyed Lacuna and Sitis' direction.
"Why would I be happy or unhappy for them?" Aureum said.
"Right, right. We're supposed to act like we're blind here."
"When in hearing distance," Aureum said, through gritted teeth.
It didn't seem to matter. Lacuna glanced at them across the fire as she spent a moment listening to Sitis say something into her ear. They were nearly sitting in each other's laps.
She hadn't figured them the type.
Well, they do like dramatic meetups in terrible weather, so what do I know?
...but they're probably playing it up.
"Why do you care?" Aureum said. "It's rude to ask so much about somebody else's love life."
Mendax shrugged.
"Rude until they're out of earshot, eh? Well, if you have a better way of passing time, I'm game."
What a perfect opportunity.
"Actually—
Except she had nothing. Not a single idea.
"Maybe, uh."
Mind like an empty sky, Aureum spat out words.
"We could make a bet?"
"Over what?"
"Throwing... needles?"
"Heh. Are you certain you have enough?"
Her mind flashed back to him pulling out the needle with his fingers.
"Yes, I happen to still have a few."
Aureum already wanted to rush off to her tent. Her skin scrawled. Not with the cold grip of fear.
It was the heat of embarrassment.
Why does it always have to be my enemies that see me messing up?
She wasn't that mad. It had been a long time since she'd felt that. Maybe tough skin does soften.
"It's all wrong though," Mendax said. "It'd be better if I deflected or dodged them. Would feel a little more fair. Since you're a wind sorcerer and all. How would I match your aim?"
That snapped her out of any embarrassment. Was he crazy?
"Maybe I don't want to hurt someone for fun," she said.
"Oh, don't you? You seem mad enough for it."
Another one of his signature knife-like grins.
Aureum felt the hairs on her arm stand up.
But.
It wasn't like she could pass up the perfect opportunity laid before her.
And his confidence could drop down a peg or three. It would be a civil service, no matter his intentions.
"I'll play, but let's have the others as referees. That way it's fair. And any possible injuries can be treated on the spot with Lacuna's bag."
Lacuna was the holder of all things medical at this point.
"I'll be fine."
Fool.
The two didn't need anything especially difficult for their bet. A pebble's toss distance from the tents as a precaution. A leaky tent would be a real tragedy.
Sitis leaned against a tree, looking bored. Lacuna, taking it more seriously, standing upright to attention by him.
The bold fools stood across from each other. Evening sunlight made the sky a dark red.
"Ready to start?" Mendax asked Lacuna.
He was as relaxed as can be. His hands hung on his belt.
"Sure."
I'm just going to push him so we see what he can do.
Aureum reminded herself that her goal was not to win. If he was after Aureum, he probably wouldn't play his full hand here. Which meant she should hide hers.
"On my call," Lacuna said, turning her head to look first at Aureum, then at Mendax.
She raised her hand.
"All right. Go!"
As per the mocked-up rules, Aureum had a full two minutes to try and hit him.
Aureum tossed her first needle as Lacuna's hand fell.
She didn't go hard for the first one. Fast enough to cause a normal person damage, but a beast or regular sorcerer would easily avoid it.
Mendax, posture as relaxed as ever, twisted arm up. Aureum hardly saw his arm move, but at the end of the motion, he held his fist before him.
Did he?
With that narrowing of the eyes, his fingers moved as he pushed the needle to his fingertips. He held it up for everybody, a closed smile across his face.
"Ha ha. Very funny."
"We should talk about how you throw these things."
"Let's not," Aureum spoke as she moved.
Two more needles shot out, both from the same hand. One arm was still in a sling, after all. The first one she made fast.
Mendax bent his body, and it went right by. The second one, slower, curved to hit.
This time Mendax moved his arm. Something glinted as it caught the sunlight.
CRACK.
Mendax watched as the ice around his arm shattered. The needle fell alongside the ice to the ground.
So far, so good.
She had just confirmed his element.
"Not holding back? I thought you didn't hate me."
His tone was light.
That was just a joke. He doesn't know anything.
Aureum didn't bother to respond as she continued to fling needles. If two at one time almost worked, then five ought to open him further.
Thanks to the mana she'd gained from the wolf's pearl, she could try it.
The needles curved and cut towards him. Mendax pulled his other hand from his pocket as they approached.
He ducked, he weaved, his arms and legs blocked or deflected.
When he stood up straight, Aureum was breathing hard and Mendax hadn't a scratch.
Drat.
At this rate, she wouldn't be able to get him to even draw his swords.
Think!
She lobbed a few more volleys. The first three were timed for his arms and leg. The next three all went for the other leg that would support him.
It went as planned at first. The first two broke ice off his arms. He used his left foot with a bit of ice to deflect the third needle.
But then he jumped out of the way for the next two and caught the third as he landed.
"Did you forget I can dodge?"
Aureum was breathing hard at this point. She felt the rush of rage.
Mocking me?!
Scaring me?!
The night she'd spent awake waiting for Lacuna and Sitis to return flashed to her. She brushed against the pit she'd felt in her stomach that night.
She forgot about trying to trick him into using his swords.
Double or nothing, she flung out two more.
One followed the exact same line as the other to the center of his chest. With all the force she could muster.
Mendax changed his posture immediately crossing his arms.
He barely managed that before the first hit.
CRACK.
The first one hit the ice.
THUNK.
Then the second.
Aureum knew it struck true, but Mendax hadn't even let out a groan.
Mendax looked at the needle that impaled his arm up to its head. He held it out, trying to see it more clearly.
Like the tree, his arm had a pressed indent around the needle.
Flesh didn't work like that unless it was reinforced.
Did he freeze his arm itself to stop it?
That was almost worse than letting the needle go through. Except, if he had let it go through it would have gone through his body.
What did I nearly do?
"Stop!" Lacuna called.
Aureum stood, feeling sick as Lacuna neared him.
This wasn't a random stranger or beast that she'd hurt, it was a person she'd spoken to. No, not just a person she'd spoken to. Somebody who'd helped her.
He might have creeped her out, but what did she have? Suspicion?
He really was very suspicious, no matter how she looked at it.
But that didn't mean he was aiming for her.
For scaring her, this didn't feel justified.
"I'm so—
"Pretty good," Mendax said. "Shall we call it your win? Guess I shouldn't have underestimated you."
Doesn't he feel pain? Fear? I almost killed him.
Nothing in Mendax's expression showed pain. His eyes narrowed again with a hint of a smile.
She had no idea if he was covering his pain or truly amused, or why either of those things would be his reaction.
Lacuna tried to help Mendax as Aureum's thoughts ran in circles. Mendax mostly ignored her. She was relegated to pulling out what he asked for.
Aureum stood like carved stone nearby.
He tied a tight knot around his upper arm before he pulled the needle out. Then he stuck some cotton into the hole to stop the bleeding. After all that he wrapped some bandages tight around the go.
It was the leftover of Aureum's old dress. The bandages they'd mocked up for Sitis.
Mendax looked up at Aureum after he was done.
"I shouldn't have gone so far," Aureum said.
The same amused and closemouthed expression on Mendax's face emerged.
"I told you, you shouldn't worry about me."
He flexed his other arm.
"It'll heal in a few days. Won't even bother me."
"Fine."
Aureum confused herself.
The bet was forgotten. The goal of having Mendax shed a few scales of mystery succeeded, after all.
Better than anyone would have realistically expected. Even injuring him should have been a gain.
They would probably make it to Fluentem before he healed. The injury should make their chances better if he tried anything. Once in the city, it would be difficult for him to do anything nefarious.
She hadn't succeeded in forcing him to draw his swords, but at least Sitis got to see some of his speed and strength. It had been impatience to expect more.
Yet even if her accomplishment was blemished, Aureum expected some rush of elation for the achievement at least.
Mostly she felt like ash after all the exertion. Hollow.
She knew the needles hurt him. She intended and wanted to hurt him just a moment ago.
Not that she completely believed she would get through his defenses, but that was another matter.
But nearly murdering him wasn't on the agenda. She'd been reckless.
Aureum finally managed to stuff her remorse into a solid lump in her throat. She forced herself to sneer.
"Well, if you insist it doesn't bother you, that's great. I think I'm gonna head to bed."
And she did leave, suspicious as it made her look be damned. She felt sick looking at the injury she caused.
The problem with running away to be alone is that it made hiding from her emotions impossible.
It wasn't as if she sat and ruminated on her damage to Mendax's arm.
She certainly didn't try to.
No, instead her mind taunted her with images of adult Vitreum fainting, her mother crying at her bedside, and Felixia shouting at her. Every time she closed her eyes, there was a new image of disaster.
She hadn't even bothered checking on Vitreum when she suffocated her back before time flowed back. With time change, did it matter if the girl had suffered any damage?
Or was there some kind of untreatable wound with the poor girl somewhere Aureum would never see?
Aureum could help the Vitreum of now. It would be better.
But she'd left her alone too.
Aureum had done everything she could. Does following creepy men into a dark alley count as heroics these days?!
It would be even more reckless to interfere without knowing everything. Why did she have to risk her life to save a child that wasn't even marked for death?
How many servants and guards at Nix told themselves the same lies?
It's not the same. The girl was warm and fed at least.
Yes, it's not the same. She didn't have a choice. And I ignored it because it was easier for me.
The girl was a spoiled brat. She might be neglected but she wasn't in any major harm. She would be fine. Even if she ended up at the same party, Aureum wouldn't be there anymore.
So Vitreum might be perfectly safe.
Or she might end up in Aureum's place.
The offenses Aureum built up had become an insufferable mountain before she took the time to notice.
Even minor ones were too much to bear.
The worry her mother must be feeling. How she hadn't even bothered to write. Felixia had been right. She was selfish.
Aureum tossed and turned as she tried to sleep.
"What are you doing all this for?" Calces said.
They sat in the dining room of home, a father looking at his daughter across the table. As they had thousands of times before when she was a child.
"I don't do it for joy. I just want to live in peace."
"By hurting people? That'll rain trouble down on your head!"
"I didn't go looking for these fights! Most of them deserved it anyway!"
"A girl ten years your junior deserved to be suffocated? A man who saved your life deserved to get his arm stabbed? Your family deserves to worry about you as you galavant off to your death?!"
"So what? I did what I needed to survive! Everyone does that! There's nothing different from Vitreum to Mendax!"
She turned her head and found herself lying on a cold jagged floor of stone, wrists aching.
Caducus spoke in words she couldn't clearly hear above her. His cold hand touched her shoulder.
"So you'll live another life driven by fear?"
She felt his cold breath as he whispered in her ear.
———————————————————
Aureum eyes snapped open.
Lacuna had a light on inside the tent as she pulled some clothes out of her satchel. She turned and saw Aureum sitting up.
"I didn't mean to wake you up."
"You didn't."
Already the nightmare was fading, but Aureum found herself reaching for the memories of it. As if she only examined it enough the fear would go away.
Lacuna finished changing as Aureum blearily stared at the tent wall. The ground was sturdy, and she felt weak.
As Aureum made no signs to go back asleep, Lacuna sat next to her. They both said nothing.
"It will be all right, Aureum. I don't think Mendax noticed anything off."
"Yeah."
"You did a good job."
"Maybe."