The silence in the apartment was thick, suffocating even. The once warm, familiar space now felt cold, as though the air itself was waiting for something to break. Su Nian sat by the window, her gaze fixed on the distant skyline, but she wasn't seeing it. Her thoughts were miles away, tangled in a mess of emotions—confusion, hurt, and an aching uncertainty about everything she thought she knew.
The past few days had been a blur of uneasy glances and half-spoken words. Lu Cheng had been distant—distant in a way that was unfamiliar, and yet, so painfully recognizable. He had always been a man of few words, but now, it felt as if the space between them was growing wider every day. Su Nian couldn't help but wonder if it was because of Mei Ling—or something else.
Her mind drifted back to the conversation they had had the night after their awkward dinner with Mei Ling. There was something unspoken in Lu Cheng's eyes when he'd apologized, something that made her doubt if she truly understood him as much as she thought.
"I want you to trust me," he had said.
But how could she? When all she could see were the echoes of his past standing between them, taunting her.
A soft knock at the door broke her reverie. She didn't need to ask who it was. She could already feel him standing on the other side, waiting.
Su Nian opened the door, her heart thudding painfully against her ribcage. Lu Cheng stood there, his expression unreadable, his usual confidence masked by an unfamiliar vulnerability.
"I need to talk to you," he said, his voice low, the words carrying an edge of urgency.
"About what?" Su Nian's voice was strained, betraying the frustration that had been building inside her for days.
He stepped into the apartment, his eyes not meeting hers. There was a heaviness in his movements, a reluctance to face whatever it was that had been weighing on him.
"NianNian, there's something I haven't told you," he began, his voice steady but filled with the weight of an unspoken truth.
Su Nian's heart skipped a beat, a chill creeping down her spine. She didn't want to hear it—whatever it was. She already felt as though her world was crumbling around her, and she feared what this new revelation might do.
"What is it?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper.
Lu Cheng inhaled deeply, running a hand through his hair, a rare sign of his unease. "It's about Mei Ling," he said finally. "And it's about why I've been distant."
Su Nian stiffened, her stomach tightening. "What about her?"
"I didn't tell you everything before," he said, his eyes locking onto hers for the first time in days. "Mei Ling wasn't just an old friend. We were… involved once. A long time ago, before I met you. And when she reached out again, I didn't know how to handle it. I didn't know how to make you understand that I wanted to put all that behind me—"
He paused, his words hanging in the air between them. The silence stretched out, each passing second more unbearable than the last.
"Lu Cheng," Su Nian interjected, her voice trembling. "I don't care about your past. I never did. But why didn't you tell me this before? Why didn't you tell me about her from the start?"
He closed his eyes for a moment, as if weighing the decision in his mind. "I thought you wouldn't understand," he said quietly. "I thought that maybe, if I just kept her out of the picture, we could have our own story without the ghosts of my past. But I see now that I was wrong. And I'm sorry."
Su Nian swallowed hard, trying to calm the swirl of emotions threatening to overtake her. She had always known that Lu Cheng's life was complicated, that he had a history that predated her. But hearing this—the admission that he had kept something so significant from her—felt like a betrayal.
"I don't need you to apologize," she said, her voice breaking slightly. "I need you to be honest with me. To trust me the way I've trusted you. I can't keep living in this shadow of uncertainty."
Lu Cheng's eyes darkened, his expression conflicted as if torn between the desire to reassure her and the fear of losing her.
"I do trust you, NianNian," he said urgently. "More than anything. But I'm afraid of losing you. Afraid of losing the one thing I've finally found in my life that feels real. I don't want to keep hiding parts of myself from you, but at the same time, I don't want to hurt you either."
Su Nian felt a lump form in her throat. She wanted to scream, to demand more answers, but instead, all she could do was stand there, staring at him. She had asked for honesty. She had wanted him to be open with her. But now that it was here, she wasn't sure she could handle it.
"You say you don't want to hurt me, Cheng, but I'm already hurting," Su Nian said, her voice trembling with emotion. "I feel like I don't even know who you are anymore. You've been holding me at arm's length for so long, and I don't know if I'm just another part of your life that you're going to toss aside when it gets too complicated."
Her words hit him like a slap. Lu Cheng's face twisted with regret as he stepped toward her, reaching out as if he wanted to comfort her but didn't know how.
"NianNian…" he began, his voice strained, but she pulled back, her heart racing with a mixture of anger and hurt.
"I don't know if I can do this anymore," she whispered, her eyes welling with tears. "I don't know if I can keep fighting for something that feels like it's slipping away."
The words hung in the air, heavy with finality. For a moment, neither of them moved. The silence between them was unbearable, a chasm that seemed too wide to cross.
Lu Cheng's breath hitched as he looked at her, the raw pain in his eyes telling her everything she needed to know. He had never been good with emotions, never been one to lay himself bare, but this—this vulnerability—was breaking something inside of him.
"I'm not asking you to forgive me, NianNian," he said softly, his voice thick with emotion. "But I can't lose you. I can't lose what we've built together. Please… don't walk away."
Su Nian closed her eyes, the tears spilling down her cheeks as she fought to hold herself together. She wasn't sure if she could trust him again—not after everything. But the love she felt for him was undeniable, and that made everything so much harder.
The world outside was growing darker, but inside the apartment, the light felt dim, as though something precious was slipping away.
Su Nian turned away from him, her voice barely audible. "I need time, Cheng. I need time to think."
Lu Cheng didn't try to stop her. Instead, he stood there, watching her walk away, feeling the weight of his mistakes pressing down on him. He had always known that love was a risk. But he hadn't been prepared for how much it would cost him.