"Her…her mother fled?"
"At her birth. One of the few…and the last to ever escape."
I turn, the whole mystery of her mother intriguing me now. "She…she did? Is she coming back?"
"Will she get the National Park the trouble it deserves?" I ask.
She shakes her head, "If it did, you wouldn't have came here."
"Impossible. She must've left some month ago, right?"
She shakes her head again.
"15."
15 what? 15 weeks? 15 Months? 15 years—
I bite my lip.
I see.
"Why would she leave her daughter at birth?"
"It's not like she wanted to. Had she taken the baby, it wouldn't have survived anyways out there in the wild."
I slowly nod. Rei never knew her mother, then. If…if her mother was here, would she even be doing all of this? Would she be trying to… assimilate and be attached so quickly and easily?
If her mother was here, would she still be exiled from her own people?
"Was her mother anything like her? Like Rei?"
"Master Lucien…if she was, you think this would cause such a stir in the last 15 years?"
I nod. Dumb question. I get it.
But…this makes no sense. The accusations for saying she copies other peoples traits? That nothing of her is her own?
I don't buy it.
"I still find it hard to believe that you think Rei has attachment issues…or just copies anyone for that matter."
"Not just anyone, ranchmasters." She corrects me.
"And who's fault do you think that is? That her own people turned on her and she had to make ends meet?"
"So, should we also be blamed for her mishaps as well, hm? How would we explain her stalking endeavors?"
I fling my arms around, not believing it. "Oh! Give me a break, will you? If she was stalking me, I would've known already."
"And I'll ask you again, Master Lucien. Is it really stalking if she gets caught?"
There was a sudden pause. A silence, even.
"She's stalked in more ways than one, and I'm not talking about watching directly. Even in her daily tasks, she turns it into a form of stalking. She listens, and learns. Everything is a habit to her. She picks and chooses which one she wants."
"S-so? And you're telling me she does this for what? Change her identity for affection? For love? Something she couldn't get from her own community?"
She didn't answer.
But.
I didn't press on.
If Rei is really stalking…then, wait, no.
What the hell does she write in her journal?
Grandmother Kon stands up, slowly, and walks away. Perhaps done with the conversation overall. I didn't even get to ask about the children, yet. That completely slipped my mind.
I was going to now, until she opened her mouth.
"If you haven't realized already, Rei has mimicked some of your mannerisms right under your nose."
"And yet, you still want to play dumb."
"W-wait! But none of this makes sense! Why did she not learn anything from Flugel, huh?!"
There was a silent pause. Again. Annoying. Not comforting at all.
She spoke.
And what she said made my blood turn cold.
"Only reason why she didn't…is because you got there first."
She walked away.
And this time?
I didn't have a rebuttal.
Everything slowly clicked into my mind. My brain started remembering events I didn't want to.
Our synced footsteps.
The same plate of breakfast we both ate from each morning. The cup as well.
Fuck.
Even the poncho.
I didn't just let her take from me.
I gave her the damn keys to my soul.
I gave her what she always wanted from the beginning.
To be me.
And…and…
…the golden insignia. The four-pointed star.
The poncho.
I didn't give her Lucien.
I gave her "Lucien Rainrunner the Ranchmaster".
Oh shit—
No, no, no.
I bolted out the house. Looked to my side.
And Rei was no longer standing there.
No. No. NO.
This is bad.
Very, very bad.
I cup my hands together around my lips, "REI!"
The Oni look around, and yet just move on. Take a few glances at me, and then act as if nothing happens. Great, this is exactly what I just needed.
To think I dodged a bullet with her. To think that things would be different than Jex.
No, it's the exact same. Just in a different fucking font.
Moving around, trying each angle, each house. I don't see a burnt orange poncho anywhere. Could she have taken it off?
No, not if she still wanted to be me. I don't even know her goal of doing this is, and I'm not sure if this is something that could be done through Breakfast Roulette.
I'm running from street to street. I don't see anything. Outlets, shops and still no Rei.
My legs don't give out, but they stop running for me. I'm back where I'm started, lost, confused…
…and beaten entirely.
I can't focus on anything.
I thought I was protecting her, and Jex too. That if I gave them hope, and faith, that they could cling onto it and wish for better things.
That's what I wanted for the both of them.
And yet I failed them both.
My hands clench, my breathing picks up. I don't want to think about it, but my mind is not letting me run away from it. Every shared moment I had with Jex. Ruined.
Anytime I thought I understand Rei, that she was growing and becoming more confident? She was just learning to be more like me.
The Lucien that I let her see outside and inside.
Couldn't pick up my boots, it grinded against the ground. Slow. Painful.
How do I come back from this?