Escapism
A psychological coping mechanism where individuals escape unpleasant realities or feelings by engaging in activities or fantasies that provide emotional relief.
That's the official term anyway. If I were asked one word to describe my life, it would be this. I don't think it's a bad term however. I think every once in a while each one of us wants to take a break, you know?
We want to run away to somewhere else and ignore our problems.
It makes sense. Humans are inherently cowardly creatures. When ever we really have to face the music, alot of us chicken out. We delude ourselves by making up excuses like "If only it wasn't this or that",etc.
I think it's fine to be a little selfish once in a while. And I know I'm not alone in this thinking. I know this because of Entertainment.
Entertainment is one of humanity's greatest inventions. Constantly evolving throughout the years, from stories written in books making use of the readers imagination, to movies visually pleasing and enough genres that anyone can enjoy.
The core principle stays the same however. It allows us a moment of joy even in the darkest of times. It allows some to live,even when their is nothing truly to live for. It is also a form of escapism.
See?
Not a bad term right?
Escapism has helped me alot before i met her,especially through entertainment, and especially through reading stories.
Specifically stories about ordinary people like me turned to legendary heroes with powers beyond our current understanding as they get transported to another world and have to take down the Demon king . It's a plot you've had bashed over your head a thousand times over. I find great joy in them however,whether their badly or well written.
Because they allow me to not have to think. Think about when my rent is due. Think about the price of groceries. Think about having to wake up to go to my dead end job, i despise with all my heart. I get to live my life through these stories. The life I WANT to live. I don't care if they all start with the guy getting hit by a truck. I don't care if there's no challenge. I don't care if the protagonist is basic. I like them and she likes them too and thats all i need.
If there was one wish,one opportunity I could be given it would be to get to be in one of these stories. To get to be transported to another world. And as I watched the truck in front of me inch slower at a snails pace I realised that my wish was being granted.
Yeah right.
I was going to die here, no better than a stray mutt. I always wondered what would go through my mind as I died.
Would I find peace and solace?
As it turns out no.
Rather my heart teamed with regrets, pressing down on me like an invisible elephant. I lamented. I lamented the stories I'd never get to start or finish. I lamented that i had never had a proper,expensive meal. I lamented the fact i had never had real friends to connect with. Worst of all, I lamented the fact I was born in this world and hoped my next life was better.
However just as the flashing lights of the vehicle became blinding, I caught a glimpse of her.
It seemed I pushed her out the way in time.
Relief washed over my heart drowning any other emotion away. Even though her eyes showed a sense of shock and despair, I felt relieved.
'I'm... so...glad'
My final string of words before I welcomed deaths embrace.
Only what I found wasn't death at all. I felt the wind slam into me as I seemed to be going...
Down? I opened my eyes and saw a shocking scene. The sky irradiated colours so bright and beautiful it felt as If I had stepped into a water-colour painting. The grass before me was the colour of emeralds as it seemed to stretch over the horizon. It held the sun high in the sky. And another sun. And another. Or what seemed like it , as they were dark blue in colour like a spherical ocean.
I have no doubt the average protagonist would simply stare in silence at this age inspiring scene,maybe even making a good double page.
I am not your average protagonist.
Instead what happened was high pitch screaming. Lots of it. Emenating from within me, until my throat started bleeding and vocal cords were ripped apart.
The two mains reasons for this were:
I had just nearly been hit by a truck and was failing to recover from that.
And I was also falling at an alarmingly rapid rate.
As i came closer to the towering trees that seemed to pierce the heavens, my voice seemed to reach the creatures inside, as multiple "birds" of varying shapes and sizes and colours flew by me. I had no time to think about that however.
My reaction time kicked in at the last second as I swerved out of the way and narrowly missed a branch,thicker than a strongman's arm from splitting me in to. Again and again I barely missed these never-ending branches. Slowly I gained some confidence believing I could survive this unharmed.
What a foolish thought.
Crack!
I felt my rib shatter as I hit one of the smaller branches. A pain I had never felt before erupted through my body, escaping through my mouth.
Just then I also welcomed the sweet embrace of the earth, as I reached land. Lying there where I should be jumping up in joy at my survival I only felt pain. Torturous pain. I wanted to lie there perhaps for all eternity but my survival instincts kicked in and I knew I couldn't stay for long. I clung to the very same tree thar had caused me this woe,desperate not to fall. As I finally stood up, I panted quietly for a moment. It felt much longer than one but I knew it was merely a moment.
It was quiet.
Possibly the most quiet it's been- its felt in a while.
Then Taking another gulp of air, I tried to think. Think of everything that happened since that truck. The truck nearly crashing into me,the falling, the hitting the tree.
Regret,fear,pain.
Pondering, I looked up at the sky. Three sun's. Bird-like creatures not at all resembling any birds I know of . Grass greener than any I've seen. Trees towering like giants over the forest. None of it made any sense.
At least... in my world.
Then it hit me.
It hit me so hard I felt like an idiot not thinking about.
'This isn't my world. I've arrived in another world'
The answer rung like a dream to loud to ignore. Not that I would mind you. Because now all that anxiousness was replaced.
Replaced with pure,unfiltered,excitement.
Accompanied with another thought.
'I've been transported here. I must be a here for a reason.'
'I must be the hero'
Suddenly it all made sense. All of it,all of my life was for this one specific moment.
So i can become a heroic individual with unimaginable powers and adored by all.
This was my destiny.
Even despite everything that happened a grin formed on my face.
This world.
This world is tailor-made for me.