I Once Loved a Flower So Much
September 19
I didn't realize it at the time, but as I sat with my friends in our usual spot near the right side of the courtyard, I saw her—and she saw me. She smiled.
I was fifteen, and I didn't know anything about this girl, but there was something about her that sparked my curiosity. So, I got up, walked over, and introduced myself.
The conversation started when I noticed her Sanrio keychains dangling from her backpack. We talked about them, laughing like old friends. Before I knew it, the bell rang—it was time to head to class.
Just as we were about to go our separate ways, she asked for my number. I gave it to her without hesitation. That moment, simple as it was, felt like the beginning of something important.
October 19
A month passed. I hadn't heard from her and, honestly, had almost forgotten about the whole thing. But like something out of a fairytale, she appeared again—this time with a friend.
That's when I learned her name: Misa.
She stood quietly by Misa's side, a little awkward, maybe even nervous. I asked her, "Why haven't you messaged me?"
Misa giggled before answering for her.
"She wanted to, but she's just too shy," she teased.
I chucked, amused. "Really? That's cute," I said, turning to her with a teasing grin.
She laughed, and that moment felt light and real.
Everything was going great… until my other friend, the one I had promised to take to lunch, showed up.
"I'm ready," she said with a smile.
In that moment, I didn't want to leave. I wanted to stay there—with Lilian. But I had made a promise, and I couldn't break it.
So, I said goodbye and walked away.
But before the day ended, I did something small that changed everything.
I texted her: "Hey."
November 19
Another month passed, and things between us started to blossom.
We were spending more time together—laughing, talking, sharing little pieces of ourselves. I didn't know if I had a crush or if we were just growing close, but whatever it was, it felt right.
One afternoon, we were sitting on the grass, sharing a meal. Out of nowhere, I decided to tell her how I felt.
"I really enjoy spending time with you, Lilian. You're honestly a great friend to be around."
She looked at me, nodded, then smirked. "Loser."
"I may be a loser," I said with a grin, "but I'm a super cool loser—unlike you."
"That's not fair!" she exclaimed. "I want to be a super cool loser too!"
I laughed. "We can both be super cool losers together, then."
"'Super cool losers' sounds kind of lame now that I think about it, Mizu."
"Well, what about super duper cool losers?" I teased.
She looked at me, eyes warm with affection.
"Hey, Mizu… promise me something."
I tilted my head. "What is it?"
"Super duper cool losers… forever?" she said, holding out her pinkie.
I paused, stunned for a second. Then I smiled, reaching out.
"Super duper cool losers forever," I said, locking my pinkie with hers.
December 4
That day, I found myself torn—caught between two people.
Lilian pulled me aside, out of view from others, her eyes stormy with emotion. She was trembling, trying to hold herself together.
"What's going on with you and Emily?" she asked.
I was stunned. "What are you talking about?"
She didn't let me speak at first. When she finally did, her voice was raw.
"Emily and I got into an argument… over text. She said she and you were getting close and that I should just give up on… on you."
There was silence. Then, with disbelief in my voice, I asked,
"You… have a crush on me?"
Her eyes filled with tears. She looked straight at me.
"Just answer me one thing, Mizu…"
I said nothing. I just listened.
"Did everything we did… everything we went through… did it mean nothing to you?" Her voice cracked. "Tell me, Mizu!"
Still, I said nothing.
"I mean, how do you think I wouldn't fall for you by now?" she said softly. "I've liked you since the first day we talked…"
In that moment, it all became clear. It wasn't just friendship. It was deeper. It was love.
Without a second thought, I leaned in—and kissed her.
"Lilian… I love you. I mean it."
We both froze. Her eyes widened.
"I want you to be my girlfriend, Lilian."
She stood still, and I gently wiped away her tears, pulling her into a warm hug.
"I'm sorry for making you overthink everything… for sending mixed signals."
"Don't worry, Mizu," she whispered. "I love you too."
That was the moment everything changed. And even now, no matter how many years have passed, I'll never forget it.
We stood there in the snow, arms wrapped around each other.
Lilian… if you still remember… it really was something special.
A few days passed, and things felt… different. We tried to go back to normal, but something had shifted.
Then one day, she asked to meet up again. Her expression was serious, her tone nervous.
"Mizu… we need to talk."
I felt the weight in her voice.
"What is it?" I asked.
She hesitated.
"I have to tell you something…" she said. "Miguel… we need to break up."
I felt the world spin.
"Why? What did I do wrong?"
"Nothing," she said quietly. "It's just… it'll be harder the longer I keep doing this to you."